Endurance.

Life gets so dreadfully tiring sometimes. Even at my young age, life still gets tiring and there just seems to be always too much to do at times. But we're set with a race before us and we need to endure all the hardships through the strength of Christ Jesus our LORD. Until we're done all we were put here to do, the race isn't over and we must have endurance.

Discipline is a major part of endurance just as marathon runners need to have discipline in their training. The more discipline we have, the better we can endure the race that is set before us. To be able to wake up early in the morning to pray, worship and meditate every single day is the discipline we strive for.

"In the morning, O LORD, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation." -Psalm 5:3

At the end of our lives, all the hardships we endure for the sake of Jesus' name will be remembered when we reach heaven. It takes a lot to endure such things. The reason we can endure these things is because we have the hope of LIFE within us through Jesus Christ!

"We continually remember before our GOD and Father your work produced by faith, your labour prompted by love, and your endurance inspired by hope in our LORD Jesus Christ." -1 Thessalonians 1:3

One thing that I pray for is that I would have fought a long and hard battle at the end of my life, glorifying Christ with all that I am. I wish that I can say the words Paul said on his deathbed.

"I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." -2 Timothy 4:7

Endure for there are greater things and there is hope.

Love.

"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." -1 Corinthians 13:13

This verse summarizes 1 Corinthians 13, which is a chapter all about love. As Christians, we are called to love. The first and greatest commandment would be to the LORD our GOD with all our hearts, strength, soul and mind. The entire law could be summed up by loving our neighbours as ourselves. How come love is so important? Love is important because GOD loved us first while we were yet sinners and had the whole salvation story planned out for us before we became Christians and loved Him. Why do we love? We only love because He first loved us!

"For GOD so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life." -John 3:16

With this love that GOD had for us, a love that was so great that He willingly sacrificed His one and only Son, He commands us to love each other just like that love He first showed us!

"My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you." -John 15:12

So how do we show such a great love for each other? We love everyone regardless of who they are, how they look and whatever circumstances for them. GOD's display was the ultimate display of love.

"Greater love has no one that this, that he lay down his life for his friends." -John 15:13

The greatest display of love is to lay down your life for your friends. But this love isn't only restricted to our friends as we are called to love even our enemies and, in doing so, show GOD's love. It's easy to say that you would die for your family or even your best friend but how difficult would it to be to die for someone you've never met before? Now THAT'S love.

It's difficult to love like this and love a radical love because our views of love are so skewed. It's difficult to love everyone, I must admit. There are some people that are just hard to love but then it's by GOD's grace that we learn to love these people and to have patience with them. But even when it's difficult to love, we ask GOD for help because LOVE IS FROM GOD because GOD IS LOVE.

"Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from GOD .... Whoever does not love does not know GOD, because GOD is love." - 1 John 4:7, 8

In our love relationship with GOD, there's no fear. We fear GOD with respect and reverence but there is no fear in this love because love covers all fear!

"There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love." -1 John 4:18

Moreso, we have to love our brothers and sisters. If we can't even bring ourselves to love our brothers and sisters in Christ, how can we love GOD? These brothers and sisters are part of His body and it's such a small thing in comparison to the love we have for GOD. If we can't do small things, how can we do large things? In comparison to our love for GOD, we hate our fathers and our mothers. That's how great our love for GOD should be!

It's pointless to have everything in the world, such as speaking in tongues of men and angels but not to have love. If we don't have love, nothing we do matters. NOTHING at all. We as Christians MUST have love!

As this love comes from GOD, we are reminded that we can never be separated from GOD's great love. As GOD is love and He is omnipresent, love is always here.

"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of GOD that is in Christ Jesus our LORD." -Romans 8:38, 39

We love because GOD loved us first, we should be transparent to the love GOD is and because we are commanded to love. We are commanded to love our fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters, friends, enemies...

All these we are commanded to love. The only thing we are to hate is SIN and all that is associated with it for GOD cannot stand any of it.

Faith.

Faith is believing and trusting in things that might not be observable at all times. When people ask you 'bout your religion, they might ask "Of which faith are you?" In that question, they're asking you what you believe in and what you put your trust in! Not to say that I don't have my struggles with faith at times but I find it funny how we as humans can lack faith in the GOD who created the universe and the GOD who resurrected Himself from the dead. To know these marvelous and miraculous things but not to be able to place our lives upon Him? Now doesn't that sound absurd?

When we lack faith in GOD, we sink just like Peter in the sea of Galilee. He started walking on the water towards Jesus but he got SCARED after a few steps. The key thing to take from this is that once you lose faith, you get scared. But what is there to fear if we have GOD?

"The LORD is my light and my salvation - whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life - of whom shall I be afraid?" -Psalm 27:1

But take heart! This faith does not originate from you but it's given from GOD. The next time you feel like you're losing you're faith, ask GOD for more! I'm sure He's always willing to give more if only you ask. Faith is given to us so that no man may boast about the faith he has 'cause it's that important in a man of GOD. Faith is stronger in some because it's granted by GOD and not because of any of their own works! When we see a fellow believer struggling with their faith, we don't condemn them for their lack of faith but we should encourage them to ask the sole source of faith!

Personally, the hardest GOD has ever condemned me was when I read through Matthew. In two different incidents, Jesus has performed great miracles in front of his disciples and 'small' matters arise shortly afterwards. These two pieces of history are found in Matthew 8 and 14.

Matthew 8: 26 - "You of little faith, why are you so afraid?"

Matthew 14:31 - "You of little faith, why did you doubt me?"

GOD really hit me in the face with these two lines and I remember crying bitterly because of my lack of faith. At that time, I was both afraid and doubted the power of GOD even though it had so recently been evident in my life. What is there to be afraid of when we have faith that GOD will pull us through all things? Why would we CHOSE to doubt His plans when we have faith that GOD works together for good for those who love Him and work according to His purpose? It's impossible to doubt or be afraid when we have faith.

Jesus said that we can do great things, such as move mountains, when we have faith. And how much faith would we need to do such said things? Faith as small as a mustard seed.

"He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you"" -Matthew 17:20

...mustard seeds are incredibly small.

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Father, if I only need faith as small as a mustard seed to move mountains, give me more faith than that so I can move the world! GOD, give me faith and help me to never doubt or be afraid again 'cause I know you have everything in your hands! O giver of faith, impart just a bit on me! Bless me with more and more faith every day of my life so I can do greater and greater things for you so that your name will be lifted high!

Amen.

GODliness.

Is it not obvious that a man of GOD has to be GODly? The word GODly has GOD in it so the connection made is that a man of GOD has to be like GOD. Being like GOD not in the sense that we try to be omnipotent, omniscient or omnipresent 'cause that's impossible. We have to be like GOD because we are made alive in Christ.

To be GODly is to be devout and to be of GOD. For me, this is the broadest characteristic of a man of GOD. GOD is so many things and the one thing that speaks to me the most is to have a heart for GOD. To have a heart after His.

So how do you achieve GODliness? Let's put it this way, if one wanted to be more like a certain athlete, they would mimic all their training principles, equipment, styles and maybe even spend some time talking to them to learn their mentality. It's the same with GOD. We read His word and spend time listening and obeying. To be more like GOD, we HAVE TO read His word and meditate on it day and night.

GODliness is shown in both deeds and results. The results do tell the true story as it would be simple to fake GODliness. Many of the Pharisees did seemingly live GODly lives but Jesus called them a "brood of vipers"! The easiest way to tell whether a man is GODly or not is by his fruits of labour.

Essentially, to be GODly is to be of GOD, be like GOD and live like GOD when He was on this earth as Jesus Christ. As Paul puts it, "For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain" -Philippians 1:21

If your living is Christ, then GODliness has been achieved as your life is one with GOD.

Father, I pray that as you make me a man after your own heart and a man of GOD, that you would fill me with your Spirit and breath in me once again. I want to be GODly and not to be of this world. I want to be of you and only of you! I want to follow your precepts and laws every single moment on your life and I want to meditate on them too! Let me follow you all of my days with all my heart, soul, strength and mind. I don't want to seek anything else I don't need anything else, GOD. Grant me full on GODLINESS.

Feelings.

I don't know if it's a feeling of disappointment or a feeling of hurt but I know that GOD has much greater things for me and that these are His plans. They're the epitome of perfection and there'll never be anything wrong with His plans. Let me live; let me live for your glory.

To live is Christ.

Righteousness (3).

Righteousness comes from GOD through faith to all those who believe in Jesus Christ.

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Father, you've righted all my wrongs already. You've cleansed me, righted me and justified me. GOD, I pray that you help me walk a path of righteousness. Let me be a righteous man in your eyes, not doing any wrong nor thinking any wrong nor having any wrong in my heart. Father, I want to walk a righteous path though I know I will be persecuted but this persecution for your name will bring more joy than anything of this earth. May I be clothed with YOUR righteousness, GOD.

Amen.

Righteousness (2).

If righteous is to be just and obey ALL of GOD's laws and holy is to be perfect, sinless and set apart, does that mean it's a step towards what GOD is? To be more like Him and to live out life as Jesus Christ did on this earth.

Righteousness.

To be a righteous man of GOD means to be just and to follow GOD's rules.

Now there are two aspects of righteousness - being righteous in man's eyes and being righteous in GOD's eyes.

Man's eyes

To be righteous in man's eyes means to follow the rules of the world and to obey them. This doesn't mean conforming to the world's standards. Why should we respect these rules of the world? It's because we do live in this world and so therefore we must abide, to an extent, to the rules of the world.

"Then Jesus said to them, "Give to Caesar what is Caesar's and GOD what is GOD's." -Mark 12:17

As long as we still live on this world, we must ACT within the boundaries of the rules set before us. With this is in mind, we give to the world what belongs to the world.

""I have the right to do anything," you say - but not everything is beneficial. "I have the right to do anything" - but not everything is constructive. No one should seek their own good, but the good of others." -1 Corinthians 10: 23-24

GOD's eyes

GOD sees what nobody else sees. He sees your thoughts and your heart. There are many things that the world 'permits' us to do but these things are not of GOD. At times, these things are part of our fallen nature. As GOD also sees our hearts, He knows the sins that go on inside that we don't act upon. He knows it when we covet and He knows it when we think lustfully. No one can hide from GOD.

"But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart" -Matthew 5:28

"The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart." -1 Samuel 16:7

All the ugliness that is hidden inside is worse that the ugliness outside 'cause it's so easy to hide. It's so easy to hide underneath masks and to just sweep all the dirt under the rug. But all of this is still evident to GOD 'cause He searches the very deepest recesses of our hearts and He knows it better than we do.

To be just and obey GOD's laws

To be just is to be fair and moral in society. We're called to be fair and moral but there's more to justice than just this. To be just is to stand up for the oppressed, to love the unloved, to feed the hungry, to cry with those who are broken and to hold those who are weary. The widows, the orphans, the lonely and the poor. I'm not the best off financially nor in terms of love but I'm much better than others. To see the injustices and not do anything about them would be creating an even greater injustice.

"Learn to do right; seek justice. Defend the oppressed. Take up the cause of the fatherless; plead the case of the widow." -Isaiah 1:17

GOD's laws are simple. There may seem like there are very many of them and I do agree that the Bible lists very many. The only way to keep from breaking these laws are to keep them in our hearts.

"I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you" -Psalm 119:11

It's good to hide all of GOD's word but when not all of it is hidden, the best principle to live by is to obey the first and second greatest commandments. Love the LORD your GOD with all your heart, soul and mind. THEN, love your neighbour as yourself. When one's in love with GOD and running full tilt towards Him, sin is no longer an option as one's heart will be SO overtaken with love for Him and there will be nothing else that one would desire.

Man of GOD

"But you, man of GOD, flee from all this, and pursue RIGHTEOUSNESS, GODLINESS, FAITH, LOVE, ENDURANCE and GENTLENESS."

-1 Timothy 6: 11

The next couple of days will be just man and GOD. Six days in the pursuit of being a MAN OF GOD. One characteristic per day to really discover what it means to seek GOD with all my heart and to know the wisdom GOD imparted upon Paul who then gave it to Timothy.

It's not going to be easy listening for there are so many distractions in this world. Therefore, self discipline will be required to not go on facebook, msn or skype. Just time between man and GOD to discover what it truly means to be of Him. I hope that in discovering these things will I NEVER EVER lose sight of Him again no matter what it means that I have to go through. I agree, troubles and sufferings aren't nice but in the end, GOD purifies us and refines us just like gold.

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Break my heart for what breaks yours.

GOD, I prayed this and you totally wreck my image on the street two seconds later. Walking down the street like a loser with tears streaming down my face. Tears not of joy, but of hurt. Hurt for the children; the defenceless.

I picked up the paper this morning and on the front page was an article about children in Somalia who are fleeing their country due to famine and instability. They're starving and dehydrated. GOD, if you can make the world flood, can you not make it rain on a single child to keep him hydrated? If you can provide manna for thousands of Israelites, how can you not feed a single child? It's because WE'RE on this earth, Father. When Fulbert challenged me to give 100%, this is what it means, GOD. This is what it means. Yeah, I'm going to reconsider how much of my paycheck I'm giving up and the sacrifices it'll imply. Maybe I can go without food for a day just so a child can go with food for a MONTH. You love the children of the world and you ask of us to just give up WHAT WE DON'T NEED. This is just extra and I'm going to push it.

"We were meant to live for so much more, have we lost ourselves?"

Praise The LORD!

I wake up every morning and thank GOD that He has given me breath for a day. Then I rejoice and praise because it says in the Bible: "Let everything that has breath praise the LORD. Praise the LORD!" -Psalm 150:6

Isn't that beautiful? Everything that has breath will praise the LORD! That's not it either! Even inanimate objects such as the mountains and the seas will praise Him! Let everything in all the earth rejoice and praise Him for He is GOD! "Let heaven and earth praise Him, the seas and all that move in them!" -Psalm 69: 34

We will praise Him for His love endures forever and His mercies are new every morning! -Psalm 136, all of it!

Finally, at the end of the day and at the end of all time, every spirit and man will acknowledge that Jesus Christ is the Son of GOD who came onto this earth to save you and me by DYING ON THE CROSS AND RESURRECTING HIMSELF IN 3 DAYS! PRAISE THE LORD! "That at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is LORD, to the glory of GOD the Father." - Philippians 2:8-11

Awesome Day

The best days are spent not in the company of friends or family, but the best days are spent in solitude and with my Heavenly Father. There' no greater peace to be achieved if you know the peace that comes from the love of GOD. Just prayer, meditation and worship. To constantly spend a full day in the presence of GOD without any distractions is just amazing. Father, your love endures forever and I know that the plans that you have for me are the best. You've also awakened me to truth and I thank you for that!

1 Corinthians 7

YOUR Sovereignty

Father, what a surprise. Through all of this you have shown your hand and it's the same hand that has been here since the beginning of time itself. I truly don't know what will happen or even if I'll have breath this next moment but I do know that you are sovereign and that you are love.

"And we know that in all things GOD works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose."

-Romans 8:28

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No matter what the plans GOD has in store for us, they are plans for the better. Sometimes it hurts and it feels like failure but GOD has much greater things are to be done. It's certain that we can't see the future unless we've been blessed with the gift of prophecy but even though we can't see what lies ahead, GOD sees and He has already willed it. Though we can't see the sun at night, we still have FAITH that it is there and believe that it is there. The same goes with GOD's plans.

""For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.""

-Jeremiah 29:11

We hunger and strive for more, we try to do our best but when GOD says "no", He ultimately has a far better plan for us. A year really makes a big difference. Though in the long run, 1/80 years does not account for much, one year could change our whole lives. As long as we continue to seek earnestly and to SPRINT towards GOD with all our strength, He will answer and be there for us. If we put GOD first, we will be blessed so abundantly that we will no longer wish for more and everything will come together under GOD's will. Many times it is our pride that separates our will from GOD's. There's the "what we want" and the "what GOD wants" categories. We see that pride leads us to think of "what we want" because we focus on ourselves and are more US-CENTERED than GOD-CENTERED. No matter what happens and where we are, to live is to glorify GOD and to enjoy Him forever.

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Father, I'd just like to pray for my brother. It's times like these where we don't ask for what we want. We pray for what you want and for YOUR will to be done. At the end of the day, it doesn't matter what we've accomplished on this earth if it doesn't glorify you. Your plans are the best and I've experienced them. I pray that he'll experience it daily also. It's so hard sometimes and it feels like we're failures but you tell us that we're the sons and daughters of the LORD GOD ALMIGHTY! GOD, have your way in his life the same way you've had in my life. Wherever his path may lead him, you are in full control and you will use him. Father, help him to give up his will in exchange for yours so that all things that are done will be done in your name and that he'll live to glorify you. I also pray for the understanding of his family. GOD, you tell us to honour our earthly fathers and our mothers but we struggle sometimes 'cause it's hard. It's hard because we try our best but they don't understand. I pray that his family will have health and safety and that you'll continue to bless them as you already have. Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.

IN the NAME of the Son of GOD, Jesus Christ, Messiah and Saviour,

Amen.

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"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

-John 16:33

No Greater Love

"Greater love has no one that this, that he lay down his life for his friends"

-John 15:13

Father, NOTHING compares to this love that you have given me. It's just so crazy, so radical, so action based, so unheard of. Jesus, you knelt there in the garden of Gethsemane as you prayed so hard that there was sweat. You cried out to GOD for help and strength. You knew you couldn't do it yourself and you didn't want to do it. But your love covered it all. You let GOD's will be done on earth as it is heaven. When they were nailing you to the cross, there's no doubt you were screaming in pain. At that same time you could've called for legions of angels to bring you off this wretched, GOD forsaken cross. But you didn't. You held on for us and there's not greater love than this. GOD, why would you choose to love such pitiful creatures? You didn't have to do it, but you did. You could've died an easier death. You could've died to make a point. You didn't have to save us. You didn't have to...

The greatest act of love in all of existence has been displayed. This love has been offered with all the tears, blood and pain. How could you not love this GOD back?

Just a quick verse.

"The goal of this command is love, which comes from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith."

-1 Timothy 1:5

Gungor

I've been listening to this band Gungor recently and it's been growing on me. Not only is their music pretty awesome but their lyrics are meaningful. Then I decided to look them up online and I went to their site. The following piece is from their website and I'll just highlight a few bits 'bout worship that I believe to be true.

“The story of God has gotten bigger to me,” relates Gungor, who is perhaps best known for co-writing distinguished songs like “Friend of God” and the Dove Award-winning
“Say So.” “We had become ‘professional’ Christians. We got to the point where we needed to figure out how to be the church in a more honest way for us.”

This bigger story of God shows up onBeautiful Things in songs born of an honest journey of faith and a struggle with what should result from worship.

“If leading worship is just about bringing a group of people into a room so we can get goosebumps and sing songs together, there’s not much value in that. But if leading worship is a means to an end, that we leave this place as a different kind of people, as part of a new humanity that God wants to create – the people that are caring for the widows and orphans, that aren’t bound by the systems of this world but becoming free, becoming fully engaged in our world – then that matters.”

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Ironically, most of the music is not directly about caring for the poor and ministering to widows and orphans. Instead, much of the album addresses the spiritual journey and the understanding of God that happens when we do these acts. Like many before him, Gungor has had to fight off feelings of disillusionment when he’s tried to love the unlovable and gotten no love in return.
“Sometimes it feels like the love just turns to dust,” Gungor admits. “This album is an expression of hope that God will make beautiful things out of the dust in our lives, that God will somehow use us, use our obedience and love, our feeble human effort, and build Himself a kingdom.” Gungor has captured this hope with sparse, poetic words.

“Please Be My Strength” likens the struggle to water on the sand, or grasping at the wind, and confesses doubt before concluding, “I cannot create it / I cannot sustain it / You are my strength.” The title track starts from a voice of pain and ends with a confident declaration of God’s ability to make us new.

Other songs emerge from an awareness of the unimaginable scope of God and our compulsion to praise. “The Earth is Yours” uses layer upon layer of instrument and voice to liken a tumultuous earthquake to creation’s praise of its Creator. The simple, almost delicate first minute of “Dry Bones” becomes a much deeper and desperate cry to God, punctuated by a pounding drum and Gungor’s transition from pleading to praising to wailing. By the fourth minute, the minor-keyed wall of sound somehow becomes triumphant as Gungor declares that life and love are breaking out.

If you want to read the full article, it's at http://www.gungormusic.com/pages/whoweare.html

GOD bless!

If we could see the future, why would we need to have faith in GOD? That's why it's impossible to go ahead in time and travel into the future.

A Prayer From a Son to a Father

Father,

You know what's running through my mind right now. You know where I'm feeling the pain, you know where I'm feeling the sadness and desperation in others' lives. GOD, I can't just handle this all on my own. I try to tell others to give it up to you but then it seems like I'M not doing anything. As a friend, shouldn't I be there for them? As a brother in Christ, should I not support them? But Father, you tell me not to worry 'cause YOU'LL take care of them just like you take care of the sparrows of the skies. I know that you have greater plans in store and I really need to work on my things like my earth/space summative and study for my exams. Why can't I just let go when there are seemingly important things that are to be done?

GOD, I just need to let go. It's not my will but yours be done, on earth as it is in heaven. I've been praying hard but you know your plans so much more than I do 'cause it's your plans. You hold them in your hands and you know the days of my life, the number of hairs on my head and the number of times I've failed and will fail. Father, as I head into exams, I pray that you bless me and give me a logical mind. I'll be needing it from you as you are the GOD of creation and all maths, sciences and history are just a small piece of what you are. Math is your logic, O GOD. You give us a little something to TRY to comprehend who you are. Science is the study of you. By studying what you have created, we see your awesome power and might! History is the path on which humans have walked looking for something that is meaningful. Some have found it and others haven't. ...still many others won't. Father, bless their souls. They really do need you. I need you.

Why do I kneel before you in awe? Why are the creatures you made called 'thunder lizards'? Why can cells take rays of light and create glucose? Why can we see colours? Why did you send your only son to die on the cross for our sins? Why does the earth revolve around the sun? Why does the sun fuse hydrogen? Why does my printer work?

,,,BECAUSE YOU ARE GOD.

Father, I just pray for all the souls out there seeking for more. SO MUCH MORE. I pray that they would find the truth and see the light I have seen, GOD I just want them to know your love as I have known it. GOD, there's nothing outside of you. Life just isn't worth living if we don't have you. Move their hearts, use those seeds planted, Father! I beg you... Just please... Open their hearts. Can't you just make them believe? Please Father, there are only so many people I can reach out to...

YOUR WILL BE DONE,

AMEN.

Who am I?

I am human

...that you care for me

I am a failure

...that you make me new

I am unwise

...that you enlighten me

I am so minute

...that you reach out and touch me

I am a sinner

...that you sent your Son to die for me

I am tired

...that you lift me up

I am of a sinful nature

...that you have shown me the light

I am powerless

...that you give me strength

I am incapable of loving first

...that you showed me unconditional love

I am Justin Lam

...that you love me so much

Tired.

Father, I'm tired. I'm just so exhausted and tired. My eyes are sore, my limbs feel like they're made of lead and I still have so much to do! Tomorrow is going to be the last time that my mother is going to drive me to school. EVER. My "to do list" seems like it keeps on growing and replenishing items. I have to sign up for this, apply for that, practise for this, go to that...

GOD, I just don't know where I'm going to find the time and energy to do this all AND STILL keep on living a radical life. I go to pray and I'm struggling to pray with power 'cause I'm so tired. It's getting kinda dry here and my relationship with you is just fine. I do so love you with all my heart, I talk to you but I'm just really tired.

BUT you give me strength, you give me wings as eagles! Oh Father, how I praise you! You revive my spirit, you revive my soul! My heart cries out for you, oh GOD! I want to draw near to you, open my eyes, open my ears! Oh GOD, just fill me with you Spirit 'cause I know this is what I thirst for. Father, you are great. Your greatness overflows and everything is derived from you. Just speak and breathe into me.

I Can't Explain This Kind Of LOVE..

Father, I'm so in love right now. I don't know why and I don't know what caused it but I just know I'm SO IN LOVE WITH YOU RIGHT NOW. I'm just gushing and I can't stop thinking of how great you are and I can't stop thinking of how amazing you are. You make things just SO beautiful and everything in your world is beautiful. The heavens declare your glory and your thoughts are that much higher above ours! Nature proclaims your majesty and just leaves me in awe. The sun, that giant ball of fire, was created by you and for us. Oh Father, you're just so beautiful!

I was losing my touch a few days ago but my fire is now ignited and I'm burning passionately, wanting to strive for more. I know there is more, Father. I can't but help live out my life to glorify your name! I want to live for everything you want and love! It's so amazing what prayer can do as just spilling your thoughts out to GOD puts you in such a large safety net that there's nothing left to worry about.

Oh Father, I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. You prepared me to be a prophet among the nations and in doing so will I edify the church. Father, you are good and your love endures forever! I will sing of your praises forever and ever!

Amen.

Faith.

If only faith were as simple as just one 5 lettered word. If only faith didn't require me to trust with all my heart that everything's going to be alright. If only faith meant that I knew what was going on.

...then it wouldn't be faith.

As I'm sitting here blogging right now, I have a bio test to study for but that can wait. I have tyndale open on a tab and a scott mission job application open in another. I haven't gotten any university acceptances but I have this feeling that GOD just wants me to have some faith and apply for tyndale. When I do profess that I believe in His plans for me and to take this step of faith and openly declare that I am ready for service, only then will He give me other acceptances.

"Those who honour me I will honour, but those who despise me will be disdained" - 1 Samuel 2:30

I kinda feel like Abraham standing with a knife above Isaac, about to offer his only son because GOD said so. Just as he's about to stab, GOD tells Him to stop and provides with a ram. It's totally unbiblical but I just have a feeling that once I put GOD first, He'll give me what I've wanted for so long. BUT it's not what I will but what GOD wills.

As for a summer job, I know that it's partial punishment for my failure to give the first fruits of my crop to GOD. I don't remember who I was talking to, but they reminded me that the first fruits should ALWAYS go to GOD and not to my family or myself. For my first job, I failed miserably. I know I've been forgiven, but I still have to accept the punishment. I do pray for a job and one that is meaningful, something that I can help others with. I know working with scott mission (provided that it's GOD's will that they hire me) will take away from my time with friends and softball practices, but I do know that GOD can definitely use me there. I've applied for a couple of jobs already and in my desperation, I've forgotten to ask GOD what He wants.

It's not what I want, but what HE wants. It's not my will be done, but HIS. I don't know where I'm going, but I know you have plans to prosper me and not to harm me. I just need a little...

,,,FAITH.

MY Sandcastle.

I was lying in bed awake last night just thinking of my walk with GOD. There's one thing that I realized and it's that I haven't completely given up on MY sandcastle. Here's the story.

I built my sandcastle on the beach, pretty smartly I must say. It's not that far from the sea but I still get a nice breeze in. My sandcastle isn't that beautiful and it serves me well. I know that it's not the best I can have, but the world tells me that it's okay to be content with what you have. These are the morals I've been taught, you see. Thing is, once in a while, my walls would break and this water would flood the moats and sometimes wash a bit away of my sandcastle. I can't prevent it 'cause the moon controls the tide and brings it in. Every single time the water strikes, I have to rebuild and every single I rebuild, the walls get weaker and weaker and weaker...

I look up the hill a bit and I see this wonderful sandcastle! It's beautiful, perfect and the dream of any boy in the world. One day, the maker of the sandcastle invites me to join him and be a part of his sandcastle. Like forts, sandcastles are pretty important things and the bigger your team, the better the sandcastle. The only catch to this is that I have to give up my sandcastle and leave it alone. I have to give it up eventually but whether or not I want to destroy and leave it all behind is the only option. Even though my sandcastle wasn't the worst sandcastle ever and it looked better than everyone else's, I chose to give it up for so much more in the sandcastle up the hill. This sandcastle is permanent and built on rock. It doesn't wash away. Thing is, I still look out onto the beach where my sandcastle used to be and I reminisce about the old times and, once in a while, I would go back just to sit where the foundation used to lie...

Now, in this short story, my sandcastle is my life, the sandcastle above is the life I have in Christ and the water is the life this world has to offer. I've given my life to GOD but I know that there's still a bit of ME in the relationship and the equation. I'm having difficulties letting go of what I want and doing what HE wants.

Father, I pray that may your will be done but I'm struggling to really do your will and to listen to your voice so that I may act on it. I think I know what I want but I really don't. You want the best for me and in your strength, power and love you would never lead me down the wrong path. It's so hard to do what you want sometimes and I struggle so much to the point where I fail. I'm like a dog, repeating wrongdoings over and over again. That's just not how my life was meant to be in you. To fully give my all and to not look back at the things of this world because I'm running and sprinting towards you, Father, is what I should be living for. LORD, help me and move for I'm not going anywhere. I don't want this open/shut door relationship anymore. I want you to tell me directly and Father, I will listen. MAKE me listen no matter how painful that may be and MAKE me do your will. Not mine but YOURS. Surely the hands that held Jesus' hands on the cross could hold my hands to your will, to do YOUR will. Father, help me.

Easter!

"He is not here; He has risen, just as He said. Come and see the place where He lay."
-Matthew 28:6

Easter just comes and goes, doesn't it? It's one amazing four day weekend filled with celebrations as many choose to get baptised and proclaim their faith to the world! It's honestly so beautiful and such a joyous time of year!

But the beauty of it all lies in the SELF resurrection of Jesus Christ our LORD. He's the reason why we have this weekend and He's the reason why we celebrate! In Matthew, a few of Jesus' friends (Mary x2 and Martha) decide to go and visit His tomb to mourn and to maybe clean up a bit. When they arrive, they find an empty grave and AN ANGEL! Obviously, they are shocked and even more so when the angel talks to them. Matthew 28:6 is what the angel tells them after the initial shock.

It's very important that Jesus predicted His own death AND His own resurrection. Before His death, He raised His friend Lazarus from the dead along with a couple others. Being alive and raising others from the dead is a pretty amazing feat that no one else has managed to accomplish within the last 2000 years. BUT an even more amazing miracle is raising yourself from the dead, something only GOD could possibly accomplish. I was thinking over the resurrection and its effects on the disciples during service on Sunday. If Jesus had told them that he would come back from the dead, how come they were so shocked and didn't believe Him? Then, I wondered if I would be amongst the people who really wondered if He really was the Son of GOD. He did perform miracles, live a righteous and holy life and was in direct connection with GOD. I think I would truly still have doubts in my head as it's scientifically impossible to come back to life after dying. It's incredulous even after seeing all the miracles and still not be able to get over the fact that He had risen from the dead.

When the angel invites the women to see the place where the LORD lay, he invited them to see where He had conquered death and sin for all eternity! Just as the angel invited the women to see and accept this gift, GOD invites us daily to eat of His bread and to spend time with Him! Where death was conquered, sin was vanquished and overcome! Praise the LORD and come to see the place where the LORD LAY!

Amen.

Good Friday Reflection

As Good Friday draws nearer and nearer, I'm trying to constantly remind myself of the sacrifice our LORD Jesus made. I mean, I tried lent and all, but I'm a failure at that and though it's brought me closer to GOD in that I have more time to praise/worship/devo, it's the things that come up that constantly remind me how much pain and suffering He went through out of love. It most definitely was not an easy path to the cross and I feel the pain whenever I think of it.

One thing that struck me was that Jesus triumphantly rode into Jerusalem on a donkey and a week later He was condemned as a criminal and forced to walk to His death as one. It took less than a week for the Jews to change their minds and how long does it take us to make that one decision to say no to prayer or not to devos? Or how often do we ignore GOD's pleas with us to turn around and refocus on Him when we lose our focus? That's what contributed to the stripes He bore and the lashes He took on His body. The walk was not easy and the taunting was not easy, He was hated, despised and spat upon.

Often I ask myself HOW COULD THESE JEWS CRUCIFY SOMEONE WHO SHOWED SIGNS AND MIRACLES AND WAS SO OBVIOUSLY THE MESSIAH? Like as Jesus said in the Bible, I see the splinter in their eyes and not the log in my eye. Whenever I get angry, whenever I talk without thinking, whenever I put someone down, whenever I take glory for myself or whenever I think of thoughts that don't glorify the LORD, I condemn Him OVER AND OVER AGAIN. I WHIP HIM OVER AND OVER AGAIN. But Father, I know you love me and I know you love me so much! I can never repay you for your sacrifice! As Good Friday nears, I have one of my favourite verses to share.

⁴ Surely he took up our pain
and bore our suffering,
yet we considered him punished by God,
stricken by him, and afflicted.
⁵ But he was pierced for our transgressions,
he was crushed for our iniquities;
the punishment that brought us peace was on him,
and by his wounds we are healed.
⁶ We all, like sheep, have gone astray,
each of us has turned to our own way;
and the LORD has laid on him
the iniquity of us all.

It's because of His death that we now live.

Your Word

"Is not my word like fire," declares the LORD, "and like a hammer that breaks a rock in pieces?"

-Jeremiah 23:29

I've walked away for a couple of days and I really haven't had my fill of GOD's word and I've abandoned it in search of what I want and something else to fill me up. I'm sorry, GOD. I'm sorry I'm such a failure and I thank you for convicting me and telling me that I'm wrong. I need you so much, Father and I can't live a day without you. It's just not possible. You just love me so much and life is so empty and meaningless without you. Even though the sun could be smiling and the shining, the earth is not bright at all and days just pass by meaninglessly.

Your word resounds within me and moves me. It's like a FIRE as Jeremiah the prophet says and it just smashes my heart into pieces. It just tells me to break free from what the world has to offer. It just destroys all competition and it burns and resonates its message within me. GOD you are holy and great and mighty! The moon and the stars declare who you are, O Father! If my heart isn't broken into pieces, you can't use it. It's just that simple. I have to be broken and not to want what I want but you want you and you alone. No one else can fill me up like you do, there's no friendship that can fill me up nor any of the entertainment the world has to offer.

As I sit here with tears in my eyes in desperation, Father you just lift me up and Father I just want to praise you for Father I know you have saved me and you have already forgiven me! This fire that burns is the want for you, that want for discovery of you! GOD, you just keep on molding me and purifying me to make me a better version; to make me more like Christ. I thank you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

Treasures.

These past couple of days, I've been feeling kinda disconnected. Disconnected from GOD. Yeah, I'm still doing my devos, praying hard and worshiping but I don't feel GOD's presence as strongly as I felt Him at TC. I know He's always there are I know that He'll be there for me, but I just don't see Him as clearly anymore. It's the TC high, I know it. BUT this high was legitimate. I miss that close walk with GOD, but now I've realized that it's a good thing that I'm feeling kinda down and disconnected.

The following is from Matthew 13:44 -45

⁴⁴ “The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field.

⁴⁵ “Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant looking for fine pearls. ⁴⁶ When he found one of great value, he went away and sold everything he had and bought it.

I know how it feels and what it's like to draw so near to GOD when He speaks through you. Therefore, I will rejoice and celebrate! I need to give everything up and buy this 'field'. I want that close walk with GOD every day of my life and I won't rest until I find it.

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I don't know what GOD's doing in my life, but I trust Him. What more can I ask for than an omnipotent GOD who is love? I know He has his timing and if things are His will, they'll work out. I shouldn't even make plans, y'know? Just let go and let Him do great things. He'll put me where I'm needed and HE'LL put people around me as He feels justified. I can't see ahead 'cause I'm not tall enough but I know that GOD will take care of me 'cause He's so big and can see ABOVE the fog and the storm.

LOVE

Nothing can ever separate us from GOD's love and His love stretches as far as the earth to the heavens. How great is this love? Unmeasurable. Incomprehensible. Vast. Awe-inducing. Indescribable.

I don't understand how GOD could ever possibly love someone like me. I'm so insignificant and so flawed. BUT HE LOVES ME. To a human, loving something that doesn't even exist is such a strange notion. Do you love your future other half? No, 'cause you don't know them. You WILL love them, but right now, you don't. GOD has an unfair advantage in that He exists at every single moment, but He loved you before you were born and He will love you on your deathbed.

GOD's love is agape love. He willing sacrificed His son on the cross. It was an offering to atone for our sins; sins committed and yet to be committed. In the Bible, GOD's love is so great for us that He loves us like a father. Now compare that to sending his SON, Jesus Christ, to die on the cross. He LOVES LIKE A FATHER, and had to SACRIFICE HIS SON. That's how much He loves us. It's not about feeling that GOD loves you, it's about KNOWING that GOD loves you and showing it to the world.

My heart breaks for people who aren't loved. Whenever I reflect on my short life, there are always those people that I know remember that I didn't show GOD's love to. Imagine what life would be like if I did. How would these people be right now? I make it a point to not regret anything that I've done/not done, so I'm going to make change in my life. I'm going to love ALL. I feel the call to love the less fortunate. Those who are poor, dirty, despised and, ultimately, the fatherless. As a father's love is so great, how horrible would it be to not have a father's love? This just rips my heart out; it's so painful. GOD calls you to feed the hungry and to give them food. I feel the call to keep these people in my prayer 'cause I just feel that it's such a deep hurt that can't be healed by people, but BY GOD.

I've personally experience GOD's love and it's just the greatest thing. It's love unfailing and BIG LOVE. To know that someone who is omnipotent and who loves you is just so reassuring. Obviously He's going to have plans to prosper you and not to harm you. It's 'cause He LOVES you. I know I've said GOD loves you too many times, but I do it 'cause it's true and because there's no other way to express that phrase. It's not a feeling that He has for you, it's Himself - it's that sacrifice!

Y'know why this is all possible? 'Cause GOD is LOVE. His very nature is to love. He CAN'T NOT love. The time old question of whether or not GOD can create a boulder so large that He himself cannot move it should be replaced with whether or not GOD can not love. The answer is no, but only sin can get in the way of it.

GOD is LOVE.

TC2011

GOD IS LOVE.

What can I say? GOD moves and He will NEVER, EVER leave us alone.

Heading into TC, I was extremely anxious 'cause I didn't know what GOD had in store and, if you know me well, I really like to be in control. But memorizing Bible verses worked out for me 'cause I remembered to not be anxious about anything, but in prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to GOD. I was legitimately scared 'cause I was worried about whether the Holy Spirit would move and whether or not I would 'feel GOD'. I learned so much 'bout this 'cause I learned that we're not 'feeling' GOD but we're KNOWING THAT GOD IS WITH US. I can tell you that I didn't feel GOD at all when I was speaking, but I knew that it was Him speaking through me and not me at all.

The first couple of days were tasking both psychologically, emotionally and physically. GOD allowed satan to try our team and to create divide between us. But through this process, we learned to grow stronger together and to rely more on GOD to help us. I know that there were a lot of frustrations and things to be upset about but the thing that struck me the most was LOVE and PRAYER. We helped out with the kitchen and I learned to really appreciate what goes on behind the scenes of TC. The ladies and gentlemen were all really friendly and MAYBE EVEN MORE PASSIONATE FOR GOD THAN WE WERE. They showed GOD's love by making food and for really caring about what the quality of the food was. The whole kitchen staffing experience showed me how to be humble and how to serve GOD with a smile even when nobody is looking. If I hadn't been chosen by GOD to do SRTC, I wouldn't have done kitchen staffing first, would've probably been cocky and did TC for myself and GOD probably would've seen the pride and would've chosen to speak through someone else. GOD, I thank you for putting me on SRWT. Going back to prayer, I know that we should be praying as much as possible, but prayer doesn't always take the form of kneeling and bowing our heads. I learned to give EVERYTHING up to GOD and to not shy away from Him when we sin. I had a lot of frustrations but I learned to love people even when they were being difficult.

When it came to worshiping on stage and leading worship in front of a couple hundred people, it was a real breathtaking experience. I have to admit that my nerves were calm the first day and I really experience GOD moving in people. My worship, ie singing and guitaring, were most definitely not perfect but I knew that it was not about me. GOD looks at the heart but humans look at the appearance. I almost got discouraged when I saw that the audience was kind of unresponsive during the first worship session, but I could tell GOD showing me that He had greater things in store. AND THAT HE DID! During the evening session, GOD moved. GOD moved SO HARD! GOD told a story of LOVE and He moved the hearts of the people inside the sanctuary. I don't know how it happened, but the songs aligned with the media message AND the speakers message. GOD spoke through me and it was the most amazing experience EVER. Before I signed up for TCWT, I actually had a vision of my talking in front of TC and of having GOD moving people through me. I just remember the Holy Spirit moving and the altar call being responded to, PRAISE THE LORD! I remember standing on stage while the speaker was doing the altar call and just repeating "Holy Spirit, move in this room. HOLY SPIRIT, FLOOD THIS ROOM!" I'm thankful for the coach that came up to help pray with me even though I still have no idea who it was and I'm even MORE THANKFUL that GOD moved people that day! Honestly, I couldn't stop worshiping and I couldn't stop smiling. My cheeks hurt that night 'cause I was SO joyful!

Day two of worshiping was definitely hard on me for my body and my spirit were both low. I was tired and exhausted from the previous days' lack of sleep and I doubted how I, JUSTIN LAM, could match the previous night's experience. IT'S NOT ABOUT ME. The first session was definitely sloppy and there was division in our worship team. I just couldn't focus nor concentrate on GOD and I just couldn't see Him. Then came the night. In between, many things were worked out and, although I was still a bit tired, things came through. GOD provides and HE'S THE ONE WORKING. The last worship was powerful and inspiring. I felt called to tell everyone how GOD was breaking my heart for the hurt and the fatherless. This is my call! My heart broke when I was speaking and I really don't care if people see me as weak, but it was GOD breaking my heart for these people. It was such a glorious sight when I saw people weeping in the audience when GOD broke their hearts too. I really pray that GOD's love will show through them and that they WILL take this calling. I've never EVER seen a TC where GOD broke a whole congregation and put them on their knees. WHAT A GLORIOUS SIGHT!

I've learnt that, if you put GOD first, He will surely work when you ask Him to move and to use you. GOD, I'm still a child, I don't know how to talk and my lips are unclean. GOD, use me and change me as you see fit. GOD, I will pray for eternity and I will worship forevermore. Prayer was extremely important in this battle for souls and the word was even more important. GOD showed SO much love during this TC and I know that He will show even more 'cause GOD IS LOVE! GOD works in His own ways and we just need to learn to LET GO. GOD, I love you and I know you love those out there that haven't even considered your existence. I will go, LORD. FATHER, MOVE ME.

THANKSGIVING - DAY 11

Father, I thank you for my capacity to think. As you are the GOD of rationality and logic, you have blessed me with only a minute part of what you have. I'm so glad that I have the ability to think and to know. I wouldn't be human if I couldn't think for myself and I wouldn't be me without what I have learned from my experiences. Honestly, I thank you for letting me be able to reason faster, in greater detail and in some cases, better than others. When I'm serving you with all my heart soul, mind and strength, I'll give you my strong mind. Help me to remember that what I have is from you and, once again, I thank you for my mind.

THANKSGIVING - DAY 10 + Stress.

To be thankful everyday is really starting to strike me. I'm beginning to see things that GOD has given me that I would normally take for granted. It makes me feel much more blessed and I can see the blessings that GOD provides me every day; ones that I don't even ask for.

As I neared the end of the day, I began to really start thinking 'bout what I would be thankful for today. What better place to think than in the shower? As I started thinking, I marveled at the water flowing all around me. As it can be inferred, water is the topic of my thankfulness for today.

I normally take fairly short showers, but, in other places of the world, people would kill for the chance to have access to the water I showered in for drinking and cooking purposes. I really thank GOD that He provides me with water every day even when it's raining and I have to walk to school. In the Bible, droughts caused famines and those were one of the worst punishments GOD had for His people when they turned away. Frankly put, no water = no food, and no food = nothing.

In another aspect, they way GOD designed water was so well thought out and so special. Water is the catalyst and supporter of life. It is a liquid at room temperature, is lighter as a solid, is polar and is a universal solvent. Without these properties, life wouldn't even exist. I'm honestly thankful for the great thought (well, GOD being omniscient wouldn't really have to think that hard, would He?) and design put into this essential of life. I'm thankful that I have access to such large reserves of water. Water at the tips of my fingers. Thank you, GOD.

---

I'm legitimately so stressed out right now. I have so much to do, so little time and I don't even know where to start. I know that GOD has plans to prosper me and not to harm me, but why do I still insist on taking things into my own hands? Is it not possible for me to tell myself not to worry? GOD, I trust in your abilities, I know you love me, but how come my body is still reacting to such high stress levels? I wish I could take a week off and just do nothing. Just settle and know that GOD is there, to listen and quiet down. Even march break is filled with TC and it's going to be loud and hectic, but GOD, I really want to hear your voice. It's that hunger and thirst that I have for you. GOD, I need strength to survive and I'm 'fraid I'm getting physically sick. GOD, I need you forever and always. Be my rock, guide, strength, deliverer, shield and the fire that drives me.

Repentance

During a certain T4C, we were discussing the fall and we started talking 'bout how one should respond when they have sinned. We naturally arrived to the point of guilt. Should one feel guilty after sinning?

My answer is no. As a Christian, we naturally hate sin because GOD hates sin, but what happens when we sin? Yes, we should repent and run back to GOD. Yes, we feel bad BUT we shouldn't dwell on it because it is impossible for us to be brought back to repentance again. We all have sinful natures, but once we are saved, it is permanent. In Hebrews 6, it characterizes it as "crucifying the Son of God all over again and subjecting him to public disgrace."

After we sin, we should go back to our Father, apologize and try to avoid sinning again. Every time I think of the crucifixion and how Jesus was crucified on the cross for no wrong doing, it brings me to tears. I could never bear to crucify Jesus again and subject him to humiliation. GOD, I'm saved and it's permanent. Thank you.

AMEN!

THANKSGIVING - DAY 6, 7, 8, 9

Down two days, have one day and an overlap of another = four days of thanksgiving blogs squished into one! The more the merrier, eh? During my days away from the computer, I've actually put thought into my thanksgiving blogs, but now it's awfully hard to remember 'cause, no matter how much I wish for it, my brain ain't no supercomputer.

SIX - SECOND CHANCE

GOD, I'm thankful that we got a second chance even after the fall of our forefather. You first gave us the choice to eat or not eat of the fruit and even after we failed, you gave us the choice to believe in you. Now where would my life be without you, O GOD? Honestly, I'd be living my life differently in its entirety. Life would not be worth living; we'd be living for the moment and for no other reason whatsoever. I'm thankful that you loved me even though I was still a sinner. I thank you for planning salvation even before Adam or Eve were created (even though eve became eve after she ate of the fruit). Honestly, it's by love that we have this undeserved grace. GOD, I'm thankful that I don't have to give anything, I don't have to pay anything to get this grace, to get this LOVE. I'm so thankful that it's free!

SEVEN - PRAYER

To be able to talk to you is such a blessing. What if I were speechless one day and I couldn't talk? I'd still have you. I thank you for being able to talk to you directly without a need for an intercessor! Sometimes during prayer, I can't put my thoughts into words, but I know that you know what I mean. It's just that you know my very heart and my mind. Sometimes prayer isn't all about the talking and I thank you for reminding me that. Sometimes it's all 'bout the listening. I can pray when I'm troubled, pray with my eyes open, pray when I'm singing, pray on the TTC, pray when I'm exuberant and pray anytime! GOD, I'm thankful. So thankful for this blessing that I've put up a post-it on my wall. You know what it says! PRAY anytime, just PRAY!

EIGHT - COVENANT

When your son came and died on the cross, a new covenant was formed. GOD, I couldn't imagine how difficult it'd be had the new covenant not been formed. We'd still have to sacrifice and we wouldn't be able to talk to you directly. We'd need an earthly priest, but that need was taken away when Jesus became our priest for eternity! Now we can talk to you directly and we no longer need to sacrifice animals and offer up other things. GOD, I'm thankful for this covenant that we have between us and for your saving grace. I'm not going to break it, but i'd rather renew it during every communion.

NINE - GOD

GOD, I know you're sovereign. I know you're omnipresent. Omnipotent. Omniscient. LOVE. Unparalleled. Majestic. The list goes on and on, but I'm thankful that you are you. You told the Israelites that you are who you are. You're just so indescribable! If you weren't all that you were, you wouldn't be GOD. Honestly, I'm thankful that you accept me for you are and that, even in your power, you still love us. I love you for who you are and for all your characteristics. You'll always be the same 'cause you're the Alpha and the Omega. It's kind of hard to explain, but you know my heart and you know how I'm thankful for you being GOD. I love you, Father.

THANKSGIVING - DAY 5

GOD, I'm really thankful that I live in Toronto. We have clear roads, health care and, no matter how much I complain 'bout it, a good transportation system. Honestly, so many doors have been opened to me because I live in Toronto. If I were born elsewhere, lets say China, there would be many things unavailable to me. The people that I've befriended due to my environment, the Chinese food I can eat as per my whim and just my city surroundings. I'm thankful for Toronto and I hope that we can make you become the GOD of this city.

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We were studying the fall of mankind today in T4C and this just hit me. In the beginning, we were sinless and we had the choice to sin (disobeying GOD is the sin) and eat of the fruit. After we ate of the fruit, GOD gave us the choice to be saved and have His Son die on the cross for our sins. Essentially, GOD has such father-like characteristics. He always gives second chances, but there'll be there day where it'll finally be too late to have that chance. Spread the word. ALWAYS.

Why Do We Love?

I finished worship practice today and, as I was leaving, I saw my GODmother and I wondered why I loved her. From there arose the question of why do we love? What triggers our love? I know that "We love because He first loved us" -1 John 4:19

I honestly have no answer to this question and I will update this blog when I have an epiphany.

Do you have an answer?

THANKSGIVING DAY 3 & 4.

So I missed a day yesterday because I was really tired and had hurt my ankle, so here's a double!

I'm thankful for my legs (even though I sprained my ankle yesterday). Honestly, I would be stuck doing nothing if I didn't have any legs. I love running and playing sports and would be stuck nowhere had I been born a cripple. I thank GOD for giving my these legs so I can run and compete. GOD didn't just give me any ol' pair of legs, He gave me incredulous ones that allow me to run faster than the average human. I'm thankful for this speed 'cause it allows me play at high levels in the sports I love. Whenever I see someone who doesn't have legs or can't use them, it saddens me because they'll never know what it feels like to run with the wind blowing through your hair or to run and slide in baseball. One day, I'm going to walk to the end of the earth for you, GOD. Just so I can repay you what you have given me.

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I'm blogging right now just before I'm 'bout to head out to worship practice. Worship is such an awesome way of expressing our adoration and praising GOD all at the same time. I'm thankful for music and my GOD given ability to have a sense of tone and rhythm. Music is such a big part of life because it's not just a collection of sounds ('cause that's just noise), but it's something so beautiful that all originated from GOD. To have music to listen to while I'm 'bout to sleep and to be able to sing with my friends is such a blessing. I also enjoy playing music to blow off steam or to use up some of my creativity. GOD, I'm thankful that you gave me music to listen to and music to make, so I return it to you in the form of worship.

THANKSGIVING - DAY 2

Prior to blogging, I had spent some time thinking 'bout what I was thankful for and I realized that I could put up a whole list. I wanted to do something that I could actually write about so that took more time to think. There are so many little things that I am thankful for, but a big part of my life that I'm really thankful for is my little brother.

When we were younger, our parents fostered a HUGE sense of love between us and it's grown to be more love than I have for anyone else on this earth. It's a brotherhood and I would rather put my life on the line that have his life at risk. It's true, greater love hath no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friend. Now I know that this verse talks about Jesus' sacrifice, but I think there's no greater love than that between brothers. Even Jesus uses this as an example of His divine love. Through anything, I know Jesse's got my back and I've got his. If it's an apocalypse, we're making it through together and I'm not leaving him behind.

I'm really thankful that I've been able to watch him grow over the past couple of years and I'm starting to see as he's maturing into the man he'll eventually be. No matter what time it is or what argument we've just had, he always knows how to put a smile on my face and to put me on the floor from laughter.

GOD, I'm just so thankful that you gave me this brother, one who looks up to me and one who has a character such as his. I know he'll grow into the man you want him to be and I pray that he follows you all his life. Make his heart a GOD fearing heart and may he get along with all men well. I'm so glad that he willingly signed up for TC this year and I know you have great plans in store for him. Show him the light 'cause I'm pretty sure he hasn't seen it all yet, but GOD, I'm just so thankful to have someone on earth to confide in and joke around with. He sacrifices things to be with me and to spend time with me, and I thank you so much for it.

GOD, I thank you for my brother, Jesse. I praise you for he was beautifully and wonderfully made.

Reconnection

So I was reading a friend's blog and I came upon this. It reminded me of my relationship with GOD and how I need to reconnect with Him, but the thing is, this wasn't posted about the intimate relationship 'bout GOD, but about the relationship between two human beings. I actually thought that it was talking 'bout GOD at first, maybe He's trying to get at something here. Here it is:

"feels like i can't even talk to you anymore.

i mean, it's cool when we do hang out, since we barely see each other, but seems like we're so uncomfortable around each other.

maybe people change?

i don't know how to explain it.

just wish that we had classes together or something, b/c it's like we never talk unless i make the effort to...

maybe that's just me..."

And this is my version:

GOD, it feels like I can't even talk to you anymore.

I mean, it's cool when we do hang out at church, since we barely see each other now, but it seems like there's something between us causing some awkwardness. It's like I can't see you face to face anymore.

Maybe I need to change?

I don't know how to explain it, it's just like there's something there that I can't quite put my finger on.

I just wish we could actually spend some quality time together, just like the good old days. It's like I never listen to your voice, it's like I'm not paying attention...

I KNOW that it's just me...

GOD, I'm sorry.

THANKSGIVING - DAY 1

I realized that I don't give thanks often enough in my life, whether it be to man or GOD. Obviously, giving thanks to GOD is more important, but we should still remember to be thankful for the people that GOD has given us. I'm going to be doing 30 days of thanksgiving and during these 30 days, I'm going to give thanks for that GOD has given me every day. Sometimes it may be specific, but sometimes it may be a collective, but thanksgiving is to be given.

---

RYAN

At times I feel like there's no hope at my church and that there's no support or longing for GOD at all. He's the one who really encourages me to continue and he's the one who spurs me to grow. I share many things with him and he does too, just normally about things that we struggle with. I know he's still growing and that there are growing pains and questions to be answered, but I'm thankful for his support. I must say that his faith is stronger than others and he thinks very similarly to me. GOD, I'm thankful for Ryan 'cause he's mature and willing to learn more 'bout you. Ryan's also very helpful when doing worship 'cause he's willing to take time out of his day to practice and WANTS to worship. I'm thankful for his support in the church and his ability to explain things of life that he's experienced before that I'm experiencing now. Even though it's a small thing, I'm also thankful that he plays CoD!

---

I haven't prayed intensely in a while and I haven't really been up to date with my reading of the Bible and it's starting to show in the wear and tear of my soul. As my soul starves, my mood to do anything is ruined. I've come to realize that our basic needs are met by eating, drinking, breathing and BASKING in GOD's presence. You get to the point where you no longer see GOD clearly and you no longer hear Him clearly. He becomes fainter and fainter, making you reach out for Him. It gets harder and harder to reconnect, but I'm going to do it. The same way I need physical nourishment, I need spiritual nourishment. GOD, help me in my quest. GOD, I need you. I need you badly, Father. Hold me in your arms once again and lead me along life's path so I have a purpose once again.

Amen.

GOD of Science

GOD is the GOD of science, but it doesn't work the other way around. There is no science of GOD. Science is the study of nature, of things that we can test and that are repeatable, but GOD is supernatural and has a personality.

NOTE: From what I'm about to write, I don't mean to demean GOD or simplify Him in any way, shape or form 'cause GOD is GOD and He's just too complex for our little human brains to understand. This is just a proposal and a pattern I've seen.

From Genesis 1:3 "And GOD said "Let there be light" and there was light."

Only relatively recently have we humans discovered that nothing is constant and that everything is relative to light. See Lorentz factor for more details. This means that the whole debate regarding whether the earth was created in a LITERAL six days or a span of millions of years can be resolved due to time dilation. In the Bible, it was six days because it was relative to the speed of the stars and they were travelling really fast, but the earth can be dated to around 4.5 million years because it wasn't travelling fast. Time was dilated and therefore the special relativity governs what actually happened. This is coherent because stars are heavy in mass, yet not that big... My point is that GOD is a GOD of order and structure. He likes to play by rules, albeit His. He also has PURPOSE. The first thing GOD created? Light. Now we know that light forms the basic structure of the universe. He knows.

For many years, scientists didn't accept that there was a beginning to the universe. Now all scientists believe that there was the big bang and that it was the beginning to all that we know of. The Bible CLEARLY states that GOD created the universe and started the chain that would lead to life as we know it. These are very coherent facts. I'm just hoping that scientists will learn from these things and seek to learn science from the Bible.

What I've learned is that sitting through science class is a way in which I learn more 'bout the wonders of GOD and His creation. I see that GOD's created a very special universe for us to live in and has tailored it so that we can actually survive as a race. Evolution contradicts that, but that's for another day. GOD just constantly tells me what He's done for me and that He made it all with me in mind. Just how special does that make me? It even reignites that fire in my heart 'cause it makes me want to KNOW so much more about Him! I'm just so thankful that the GOD we believe in, the one true GOD, is a GOD of order and one who loves us so much that He was willing to prepare everything AND STILL send His only Son to rescue us all. It's like someone building the house, furnishing it AND STILL paying the rent for you. Why? 'Cause it's love. It's that simple.

LORENTZ FACTOR:

Essentially, everything is relative to the speed of light and changes according the ratio of how fast it travels compared to the speed of light. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lorentz_factor

Break My Heart For What Breaks Yours

This is such a simple, yet elegant prayer. And it has changed my life so much.

Every time I see injustice or the broken, the sick, the fatherless and the lonely, GOD breaks my heart. I find myself crying or tearing up much more often. LORD, there's just so much pain in the world and so much suffering. GOD, the things that happen in the world, I know it breaks your heart too.

This morning, I was listening to the radio in the car while heading to church and Ravi Zacharias (An awesome speaker) was talking 'bout this one guy, Damien (You can google it along with leprosy) and how he LITERALLY reached out and touched the lepers. He was eventually killed by leprosy, but he did what Jesus did on this earth and he did what GOD would've done. He lived among the sick and he ministered to them. He was literally GOD's hands and feet on this earth. GOD I want to give up all my selfishness and all my reservation and just give it up to you. Use me like you used Damien, GOD; give me the courage! LORD, I can feel the pain in this world and I know you've called me to love. To show the love that you've shown me to everyone else on this world. Use me to heal not just bodies, but to bring their hearts to the ultimate healer, YOU.

When I prayed "break my heart for what breaks yours," I didn't know it was such a powerful prayer, but it has hit me. And there's more to it...

Break it, LORD, 'cause I know you've fixed it.

A Quick Prayer

Hey GOD,

I've really been feeling you recently even though I've failed you a couple, scratch that and make it a million, times. GOD, you want me to love like you loved me and you want me to show it, but I don't know how. I'm scared. I'm honestly so scared of what you're going to do with my life, so scared of how you're going to use me and even more scared of who I'll become after you're done with me. LORD, I want to be on fire for you and I want my soul to burn every single time I hear your name. I've been letting you chisel away at me for a while and I feel like I've retreated and maybe even regrown some of these parts. I think it's time that you start again before this cancer starts destroying me. LORD, I don't know if I truly reflect who you are, but I want to. I want it quick and clean, but I know it's not going to happen. It's going to hurt 'cause my fallen nature makes me love what you hate. I know it's not the outside that counts and not the results on earth that count, but sometimes I just can 't help but wonder why. It's so painful to see five or six people show up for Christian fellowship, but what have I done? WHY have I done nothing, GOD? Am I scared? It's not that I lack time, but the time I have, I spend with friends, playing video games, doing things that won't further my relationship with you and things that won't further your kingdom. Help me, GOD. I don't know where to start. I want to start again where the healing began and I want to experience you each and every day that I have before. Those times when you were so real to me and those times when I could reach out and touch your face. GOD I'm close enough to notice that you're around, but what I really want is to hear you, hold your hand and follow you. GOD, MAKE me who you want me to be, SEND me where you want me to serve and GUIDE me when I'm lost.

GOD, I'm sorry that I talked so much, it's time for me to listen and I did say that I would do a quick prayer. I love you so much.

LOVE, your faithful servant,

Justin Lam

As All Creation Lives To Glorify One Name

I haven't done my morning devos, so I have nothing really fresh to share revelation-wise.

As of now, I do know that many out there (particularly the students in TDSB and Peel) are thanking GOD because of the snow day just like me. GOD, I want to thank you for this opportunity to get some rest and to have more time to do devos! I'll head off to do them after I'm finished this blog.

Now glorifying and praising are two evidently different things. To praise is to proclaim an exemplary part of something and tell everyone how good it is. To glorify is to BRING praise, more specifically glory of course, to that something. I thought I'd clarify this first.

One day, all creation will live to glorify that one name. The name of Jesus CHRIST, the Son of GOD, CREATOR and GOD. I know that I listed a couple names, but if ALL creation is going to glorify it, would there not be a difference in language? Who cares 'bout the difference in language? That one name is still the same name whether it be said in Chinese, English or French. There's going to be a marvelous day where EVERY knee will bow and EVERY tongue will confess that Jesus CHRIST is LORD.

For an old catechism, "Man's chief end is to GLORIFY GOD and to enjoy Him forever." We were made to glorify GOD and to show how awesome He is. Our bodies are His temple and evidence of His spectacular design. What we say and do, whether it's something minor like arriving late for class, affects how we glorify GOD. If you arrive late for class, are you glorifying GOD? We need to glorify GOD and that's our ultimate goal. You may think that GOD created angels for this sole purpose, but the angels can only PRAISE GOD but not GLORIFY Him. We were made to GLORIFY, to reveal GOD's actions. Show how He is working through us. We have choices. The choices we make reveal what GOD has done in us.

Glorify the LORD your GOD, brothers and sisters.

AMEN.

A Second Chance

Oh GOD, please don't turn your face from us!

I was talking with a friend yesterday 'bout how spiritually weak our respective churches are and how that it's difficult to dive deeper into the Bible when even the foundation and the basics aren't there. I don't know if you can relate, but many of my church members have been going to church for many years but they show no signs of growing or even interest. Are they coming 'cause they've been doing it for so long? Or is it 'cause of their parents? OR because they have friends at church?

I was reading Jeremiah today and I came across this;

"Faithless Israel is more righteous than unfaithful Judah. [] Return, faithless Israel, I will frown on you no longer for I am merciful."

Do you know what this implies? GOD is letting go of those who He has given a chance to but have been unfaithful to Him. They have turned from Him and chosen their own paths and chosen NOT to accept Him. He's going to turn to those that have never had a chance to know Him. Just like He turned away from His chosen people when they refused to accept that Jesus IS the messiah.

GOD, don't turn your face from my church. Don't turn your face away from my friends. I'm begging you, O LORD. I'll do anything. I'll talk to them next week. I'm begging you for one more chance, GOD. Just like Abraham asked, GOD I'm asking. Don't turn away, my GOD. Just one more chance, I'm begging you. When your face is turned, there is weeping and gnashing of teeth. Don't do it. PLEASE.

Just one more chance.

I beg of you. With tears on my face, with me on my knees.

LORD, You Are Good!

GOD, I want to thank you. Nothing in particular, but I just want to thank you for EVERYTHING! You make everything so amazing and everything so awesome. I love it when my Father shows up to see what I've put together for Him. It's like being a child again, handing dad that ugly piece of drawing, but seeing that look of pride in his eyes.

LORD, may all glory be to YOU! I don't want any part of it. The only glory I want is the glory reflected off you. Let the praises be to your name and not mine, oh GOD. All I want is just a glimpse of you, GOD. May the earth resound with praise as we hear as ALL creation lives to glorify YOUR NAME! GOD, I praise you from the top of my lungs and I will praise you as long as I have breath. I will shout your name to all the earth and tell them the story of what you have done in my life. I don't care if it's a million miles I have to walk, or however many things I have to suffer for your name. I'm going to do it, GOD. It's a promise.

FATHER, I am yours forever and you are mine. Hold me in your arms and never EVER let me go. I truly want to spend eternity with you 'cause you're just so amazing and you make you EVERYTHING beautiful. Use the skills and talents that you have given me and let them sing of your wonders!

WONDERFUL, even though we're such failures and we don't live up to the name CHRISTian, you still accept us. Even though we're so broken and we can't compare to the worship of your angels, you still accept it. I thank you SO much for accepting our offering of praise 'cause we don't deserve it. We don't even deserve to wash your feet, but yet you still accept our offering of worship.

LOVE, EVERLASTING, ALPHA AND OMEGA, PRINCE OF PEACE, COUNSELOR, MIGHTY GOD, THE CREATOR OF IT ALL! Thank you and may the world praise your name forever!

Amen.

The Glory Of It All

The glory and majesty of it all just constantly blows me away.

The complexity of the universe, how quarks have their own spin, how there are force particles and how chloroplasts can produce organic molecules from inorganic molecules just totally blows my mind. How can such a vast 'thing' called the universe be so ordered? It just constantly amazes me at how everything fits together. It's just not possible for entropy to have done such a thing. There truly is a GOD.

Often, people ask "how can you study science and be a Christian?" My answer? When I study science, I just study what my Father has created and made. I also get to enjoy it and learn 'bout it, SCIENCE (the study of knowledge) is NOT contradictory with CHRISTIANITY. It's just how certain people consider evolution to be proven science even though we cannot know what exactly happened during evolution.

I once heard on the radio a chemist who was speaking regarding evolution. He said something along the lines of :
Do you know why many scientists prefer evolution over creationism? It's just because of their metaphysics, but it's because there's so much more to teach about evolution. With creationism. it's just one lesson on "GOD creates the universe in six days," maybe even an extra lesson when he rested. But with evolution? You get to teach the basic chemistry, the biology and the physics involved. That's why many scientists prefer evolution.

Just a bit of food for thought. Personally, I don't necessarily disagree with evolution in the sense that GOD created us a little bit differently and as intelligent and well designed beings, we evolved to be able to survive our surroundings. This does NOT mean that I agree that we evolved from single celled organisms. In my book, this is impossible. Even given the time evolution was suggested to take place in, life is way to intricate to randomly MUTATE from nothing.

What is life is a blog for another day.

Jehovah Jireh - GOD provides. He will always give to the seeker and provide for those seeking knowledge, for He is GOD.

In The Middle

At times in our faith, we're mediocre. We're lukewarm, not gaining ground, not moving up nor down, whatever you want to call it. It is said that if you're not moving closer to GOD, you're slipping down the slope.

Being mediocre gives us that sense of helplessness. The "why can't I do anything" and "why is everything just passing by" syndromes come from this. It makes life so pointless. Originally, I was going to write 'bout how being mediocre is okay sometimes, but GOD put a change of heart in me. I was going to say how mediocrity provides a contrast between the highs and the lows, but being mediocre is just plain ol' bad.

Even when you KNOW that you need to go back to GOD, you just don't feel the initiative to. You want to, but you don't want to do the work and part of you is lazy. It's such a struggle 'cause we're all human. I still haven't figured out a way to dig myself out of holes yet, but I hope to never have this struggle again, but I know I will. One day, I hope to find way to put myself back in the run, but I know that I will need the power of the Holy Spirit and that it's the only way. I try to do things by myself WAY too much and I know that I need to let GOD do it more often. As previously mentioned in my previous post The LORD's prayer, may YOUR will be done on earth as it is in heaven.

Fight the mediocrity and let GOD work and move your heart so that you burn like a fire for Him.

Amen.

The S Word

Suffering.

How many people actually enjoy suffering? Probably no one. Is suffering good or bad?

It struck me as we had some sharing time during T4C in a small group of people that suffering isn't bad. Suffering is good. The time old adage is that suffering builds character, but suffering is more than just a character builder.

The suffering I'm talking 'bout is the one that brings one closer to GOD. Through suffering and trials do we rely on Him more and begin to trust Him more. This suffering, though unpleasant, is good for us spiritually. Too often do we focus on the world itself and not enough on the spiritual sense. Though it may hurt physically and in this world, the rewards we reap are in heaven and out of this world.

We should pray for suffering. Agree, disagree? We should pray for suffering because, as Christians, we want to be closer to GOD. Although our hearts tell us that we want to be closer to GOD, it may be hard to actually pray this prayer and mean it wholeheartedly 'cause, as humans, we don't want pain. When we pray for suffering and GOD answers this, He's only refining us more and we're only getting closer to Him.

Is this worth the pain? It's your call and your battle within yourself. While suffering, look through the fog and mist and see the light that is there waiting for you. Take the pain and focus on GOD.

The LORD's Prayer

When I can, I like to start off my day with the LORD's prayer. If you think 'bout it, how many times have you said it? If someone paid me for every time I've said it in my life, I'd be rich. But if you deduct the amount of times I'd just mumbled it and said it for the sake of saying it, I wouldn't be so rich anymore.
After all, the LORD's prayer is important, else it wouldn't be in the Bible. But if we examine it and actually meditate and think upon it, we can see that it's a powerful prayer.

Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name,
Oh GOD, OUR GOD! LORD you are in heaven and you are watching, we glorify your name on high! Hallowed means to honour as holy. We honour you oh GOD and we are reverent of your holiness.

Your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
May your kingdom come, LORD. The day where there will be no crying or weeping, your perfect kingdom, THE kingdom of heaven. May your will also be done on this earth, may you dictate my life today and forevermore, having whatever you want to be fulfilled.

Give us today our daily bread,
Feed me spiritually, for I hunger for you and I need you. The same way I am about to eat breakfast, may you fill that hunger as I wake up in the morning.

And forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.
LORD, I'm human and I will fail, but forgive me! I also want to be like you and be as forgiving as you, especially even when you were on the cross. You forgave them, my LORD, help me to do the same. Also, help me to not be so quick to anger, but rather quick to love.

Lead us not into temptation,
Guard my eyes and my heart, give me clean hands. I am yours and yours alone, let no one take me from you.

But deliver us from the evil one.
Satan will surely attack, but help me through it with your word for it is sharper than a double edged sword!

For yours is the kingdom, the power and the glory for ever and ever,
Who said worship and adoration can only come with music? This is a verbal version!

Amen.
Amen.

---

I've finally arrived at the part of Hosea where he begins to talk about GOD's great love. I've seen my own brokenness reflected in Israel and now GOD will show me how great His love really is. One thing that I really wondered while reading through this was how Hosea constantly changed between "I" as in GOD and referring to GOD as "GOD." Hosea is written by Hosea about the words GOD had said to him (see Hosea 1). I realized today that there are two possibilities.

1) GOD is frankly referring to His other parts of the trinity. Easy.

2) Hosea is SO close to GOD that He has become part of Him and GOD is just speaking through Him plainly. It's as if one day, GOD just spoke through you to you. "Hey, this is GOD speaking." Right out of your own mouth. I want to be as close as Hosea was and I wish I were that close today, but it's a growing process and I'm determined to get there.

Amen.